Ok, so the truth is that I hate gardening. I hate the feeling of dirt underneath my watch and nails, I hate the monotony and complete futility of weeding, and I hate spending time squatting uncomfortably, nurturing a plant which I know will probably die in a couple of weeks. I hate donning crappy swim shorts, applying suncreen, and putting on old ugly shoes - fake crocs actually, no wonder it's miserable! But somehow I have managed to do it, and somewhat successfully, in the last couple of years since we lived in our own house. In fact, as I smugly go about my outdoor chores I have often thought about writing a book about gardening for people who hate gardening. You know, something like "Gardening for Dummies 101" or "How to garden when you hate the outdoors" etc...
Basically, if you came to my house you would assume I don't garden at all. That I never weed or plant or mow. That's kinda the trick. It looks wild, sometimes ugly and unruly, but you should see it when I don't do anything.
So I think if you were to plan a garden for your beach house or holiday spot, obviously you would not be envisioning grand ideas of cultivated prize roses and pruned animal-shaped bushes. Topiary is the word I believe. You would probably be leaning more towards grasses, ground-covers, wild perennial flowers and lots of shell or gravel. Or, lets face it, concrete. Of course, I'm making a lot of assumptions on your behalf, but bear with me.
In my garden, I have given up on planting extravagant, elegant or even just beautiful flowers. I just can't commit time to taking care of them like they deserve. You know, the ethos of not buying a small cuddly dog if you're going to be out all day. So I plant cheap hardy critters, who like danger, a rough life and no TLC whatsoever. If they don't survive, I cross them off the list. Darwinian theory of survival. Lavender has done well, although they're quite dried out at the mo. They are the longest and hardiest of survivors in my garden, definitely gold medal material, for not only continuing to eke out an existence but for flourishing against the odds.
Succulents, cactus, any sort of desert plant is equally a winner. Huge Yukka plants loom amongst my Kaikouia(sp?) grass, with a devil-may-care attitude.
My favourites so far are Nastursiums(sp?). You either love 'em or you hate 'em. I love their vibrant open little faced flowers, tacky and garish but adorable. And they spread, because they're basically a kind of weed. And they taste peppery, if you scrunch some petals over your salad. Edible flowers are the best! I haven't actually eaten any of mine yet though, because I'm so terrified that if I touch a plant, it'll die.
The other plants that have survived my Black Thumb are those that were planted before we got here, clearly here to stay! We have at least 6 citrus trees or bushes, that actually yield huge crops of bumpy but sweet fruit. Also heaps of feijoa trees, who used to produce big juicy fruit until I pruned them too hard one year(see?) and now they produce tiny little fruit. A lovely plum tree, and a tamarillo tree that produced two bumper seasons of huge glowing jewel-like fruit, and then just up and died. I think I squinted at it. And lots of bigger trees that I can't name, except for the cabbage tree. Even I know that one!
Another short-lived success are the pots. Because the soil on our land is acidic and has a lovely concrete-like feeling, it's very hard to plant straight into the ground, even on the patches which we lovingly(at first) and then later on, violently turned over, watered, mixed in all sorts of goodies and top soil etc. So my short-term solution is I buy some cheap but cute pots at the op-shop(Whangaparaoa Hospice Shop is the best in the land) and then fill them up with cheerful tough plants like impatiens(another tacky but cute flower) or marigolds. Also herbs like rosemary and basil. Then I place them around the garden strategically, or hang them from trees, and it looks like stuff is growing in my garden! Voila! I like to think of them as implants...
So I think if you were to plan a garden for your beach house or holiday spot, obviously you would not be envisioning grand ideas of cultivated prize roses and pruned animal-shaped bushes. Topiary is the word I believe. You would probably be leaning more towards grasses, ground-covers, wild perennial flowers and lots of shell or gravel. Or, lets face it, concrete. Of course, I'm making a lot of assumptions on your behalf, but bear with me.
In my garden, I have given up on planting extravagant, elegant or even just beautiful flowers. I just can't commit time to taking care of them like they deserve. You know, the ethos of not buying a small cuddly dog if you're going to be out all day. So I plant cheap hardy critters, who like danger, a rough life and no TLC whatsoever. If they don't survive, I cross them off the list. Darwinian theory of survival. Lavender has done well, although they're quite dried out at the mo. They are the longest and hardiest of survivors in my garden, definitely gold medal material, for not only continuing to eke out an existence but for flourishing against the odds.
Succulents, cactus, any sort of desert plant is equally a winner. Huge Yukka plants loom amongst my Kaikouia(sp?) grass, with a devil-may-care attitude.
My favourites so far are Nastursiums(sp?). You either love 'em or you hate 'em. I love their vibrant open little faced flowers, tacky and garish but adorable. And they spread, because they're basically a kind of weed. And they taste peppery, if you scrunch some petals over your salad. Edible flowers are the best! I haven't actually eaten any of mine yet though, because I'm so terrified that if I touch a plant, it'll die.
The other plants that have survived my Black Thumb are those that were planted before we got here, clearly here to stay! We have at least 6 citrus trees or bushes, that actually yield huge crops of bumpy but sweet fruit. Also heaps of feijoa trees, who used to produce big juicy fruit until I pruned them too hard one year(see?) and now they produce tiny little fruit. A lovely plum tree, and a tamarillo tree that produced two bumper seasons of huge glowing jewel-like fruit, and then just up and died. I think I squinted at it. And lots of bigger trees that I can't name, except for the cabbage tree. Even I know that one!
Another short-lived success are the pots. Because the soil on our land is acidic and has a lovely concrete-like feeling, it's very hard to plant straight into the ground, even on the patches which we lovingly(at first) and then later on, violently turned over, watered, mixed in all sorts of goodies and top soil etc. So my short-term solution is I buy some cheap but cute pots at the op-shop(Whangaparaoa Hospice Shop is the best in the land) and then fill them up with cheerful tough plants like impatiens(another tacky but cute flower) or marigolds. Also herbs like rosemary and basil. Then I place them around the garden strategically, or hang them from trees, and it looks like stuff is growing in my garden! Voila! I like to think of them as implants...
1 comment:
i still mourn the loss of the rosemary....
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